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 The Other Side 264

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Phlegm

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Number of posts : 751
Registration date : 2007-04-26

PostSubject: The Other Side 264   Wed 29 Jun - 12:43:54

In Extremis
Fanzine of Extreme Prejudice and the Eternal Champions
Incorporating ‘The Other Side’ Issue 264


Dark Elves Bring Darker Days

Extreme 0 Niggling Nagarothians 3


Thirty two thousand fans watched this one, Extreme’s second league game this season in what has been a difficult start. The Dark Elves, formidable opponents had already faced our heroes twice but in unfriendlies only. Honours were currently even with a win apiece and two casualty draws.

Elves on Front Foot At Once
Hastican won the toss and elected to receive deploying additional training to make up close to a quarter of a million gap in team values. The dark elves set up aggressively in defence with five on the line and followed up with a blitz with their wych elf. Evil Blata fell on our left as the ball fell between our pestigor pair.

Blistering Score
Qualacob blitzed down the wych and Bactillia scored a stun. Evil Blata was then KO by the wych and it moved adjacent to MVP Gatchamee by the ball. Cranial McCavity and Shascue then scored Kos only for Imrin Vhan to be KO in reply. Gatchamee was downed and the wych grabbed the ball and scored in a stunning display of deadly dexterity.

Stupid Beast Opens Defence
All knocked out players recovered despite no babes being present and with the game still young we started our second drive. The elves annoyingly defended perfectly and in force massing against our line. Bactillia chose this moment for some real stupidity which didn’t help, and this left our centre dangerously open.

Attack Builds
Malekor had grabbed the ball and headed right where the elves were temporarily weaker and with Shascue and Jet Haberthwaite resisting blocks strongly the elves brought their reserve wych elf over to that flank. Shascue now knocked out one of the wychly pair and we pushed forward on the right as the beast recovered.

Attack Bogs Down
The defence swarmed back to the right and a wych elf made it through to menace Malekor whilst only a few remained skirmishing on the left where Dick was stunned by the runner and Blata also fell. We failed to break away from the defenders with a poor round of blocking and then Vhan and McCavity were stunned.

Attack Self Destructs
Malekor then fell and the loose ball tempted a blitzer who tried to dodge past Cheg, but a savage tackle by the big warrior did serious damage to the elf who was seriously hurt. A pestigor snatched up the ball but in trying to get into scoring range Gatchamee knocked himself out going for it leaving the ball free again.

Failure Punished
The Nigglers recovered and passed long for a second score against the drive. 2-0 at the half and 1-0 to us on casualties, Malekor remained in the KO dugout, as did a dark elf and as the Nigglers had only a squad of twelve the second half started 10 v 11 in our favour.

Crowd Kill
The kick went straight to elvish hands and the attack moved against our right where our defence was a trio of rotters. The beast also moved to tentacle some of the attack on that flank and Qualacob scored an injury and moved to block the path of the attack only to be shoved into the crowd by a frenzied wych. Unfortunately it was a particularly hostile section of the crowd and he was torn to pieces. Incredibly our sixth player killed in 11 matches.

Another Kill? Surely Not?
To make things worse, Malekor had also just been killed, but fortunately he regenerated. Now an attacking pass went wide and Shascue and two rotters moved to protect it. Jet gathered the ball. Bactillia meanwhile had three opponents enmeshed and a blitz attempt on Jet failed as a blitzer over extended himself.

Out Manoeuvred
Four elves now downed our beast on the right freeing up several players and Jet was only loosely guarded by his comrades who were too widely scattered to effectively defend him. Inevitably the slippery elves got through, a wych got hold of the ball after the runner felled him.

Elves Toy With Us
This left the elves able to out distance us and eat up the clock whilst we turned to inflicting damage. Shascue did put an elf into a friendly section of the crowd who obligingly killed him but the elves notched up a third touchdown. A final brief drive where we looked for consolation casualties also failed to bring any result other than a mixture of brilliant coaching countered by an illegal procedure call.

Coach Fury
Hastican was very unhappy: ‘Exited without indications and extended sabbatical has no influence. Grumbling shumblers of barbecued gnats whiskers show no confluent intimation of reigned indifference. Not even grappled twin engines can compensate for nautical jauntiness.’ You said it coach. A dismal performance then not even the compensation of a new rotter to replace the luckless Qualacob as the kill was inflicted by the crowd.

Gloomy Outlook
Winnings were also insufficient to purchase a much needed third pestigor. Desperate times for Extreme who continue to perform poorly and lack an effective attack. With so many players lost they continue to have setback after setback preventing them building a team to challenge for anything.

The ICF

Ever wondered why everyone and everything dies?

Ever wondered why everything wears down, or away, or out?

Ever wondered why everything rots, or degrades, or fades?

Ever noticed that stuff just happens whether anyone arranges it or not?

It’s because there is one dominant power in the universe.

It’s because nothing can resist the inevitable.

It’s because chaos is the natural order of things.

Incorporated Chaos Force:
Nature’s way; Our Way:
Make Chaos Your Way Too

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