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 The Other Side Issue 262

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Phlegm

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Number of posts : 753
Registration date : 2007-04-26

PostSubject: The Other Side Issue 262   Wed 1 Jun - 12:07:20

In Extremis
Fanzine of Extreme Prejudice and the Eternal Champions
Issue 262 Anorak Corner Special



Chexit For Extreme Despite Killer Performance

Extreme Prejudice 1
Human Waste 1

Human Waste win 2-1 AET

Extreme Prejudice faced the cream of humanity in the semi-final of the truncated Chaos Cup. Extreme had made this stage in their inaugural season against much tougher opposition and hoped to go one better this time. Extreme brought a babe to make up for their slightly lower value. A disappointingly poor crowd of 22,000 was mainly supporting the opposition.

Instant KO
Waste won the toss and elected to receive. He formed his team up with two linemen in reserve and overloaded our right flank with their formation. As usual they fielded three blitzers, a catcher and a thrower. The ball fell moderately deep on the right and the humans opened the attack knocking out Malekor on the flank with a blitz.

Early Injuries
Jet Haberthwaite took down the lead blitzer and Bactillia moved to enmesh two linemen in its tentacles. Jet then fell though seriously injured and will not be appearing in the next game as a result. Orblio managed a casualty in return, his one a kill but the humans continued to advance against the right.

Waste Penetrates
Bactillia held on to its two captives but the humans were edging past with a widely dispersed cage protecting their catcher. One lineman now broke away from the beast and Imrin Vhan went down stunned on the left. Gotchamee desperately broke through to the catcher but was unable to attack.

1-0 To Waste

We brought more defenders around but Cranial McCavity and Cheg had been left behind as well as most of the rotters, the catcher blitzed down Gotchamee and ran in the score. This at least brought back Malekor from the KO dugout, Meanwhile the slain human joined as our new no 16 Kraz. So although we had suffered a casualty we had made it up and there was plenty of time for us to tackle a weakened enemy.

Foul Waste
Both sides displayed brilliant coaching at the restart and the ball dropped between our pestigor pair where Malekor scooped it up. We advanced through the centre and new guy Kraz was downed and fouled for his trouble by his recent colleagues. Nice to see old friends reunited in the true spirit of the game.

Quick Turnovers
Bactillia again snared a pair of defenders as Malekor broke to the right. But then Bactillia fell to a bold blocking move, fortunately they could not capitalise, turning it over as Shascue tackled a dodging lineman. Gotchamee then failed a block as Bactillia struggled to regain its foot.

Extreme Equaliser
A blitzer attacking Malekor then stunned himself allowing Malekor to run in the score. All square at the half on casualties too but the humans’ KO failed to recover leaving the whole Waste squad committed. Fayley Bayley came on for the unfairly targeted Kraz carrying on Hastican’s policy of squad rotation.

Second Human Wasted
The kick was deep on our right and brilliant coaching again by the humans. Then Shascue scored our second casualty, another kill. Rotter Dick joins the squad as a result. We began a series of fouls with Orblio going first, meanwhile McCavity was resistant to attack, helped by his foul appearance.

Waste Reels Under Multiple Blows
At this low point in the match Hastican succeeded in nobbling the opposing coach with an exploding toffee that detonated one of his molars, blowing a massive chunk off the luckless human’s skull. A blitzer left the field KO after fainting with shock and a third human fell dead at Qualacob’s hands, he joins the team as Dave.

Ball Freed As We Threaten Score
Another blitzer then downed Gotchamee who had the ball but it bounced fortuitously to Imrin Vhan. Sadly Vhan was then immediately floored by the catcher as a tight mass of players milled close to their line. Bactillia, away from the main action knocked out one of its captives.
There were now only seven humans on the field, not all standing and five were locked in melee within the main throng and one struggled in a sea of tentacles.

Waste Slide Away
Then, it happened. Malekor was blitzed down and the humans picked the ball out of two tackle zones and passed out of two tackle zones and a disturbing presence zone too, and it was caught by a lineman who was also in a tackle and disturbing presence zone. He then dodged away from Shascue to our right.

Desperate Scramble To Get Back
Those humans still standing broke away to try and cover their comrade with the ball and they were quite successful, however Bactillia was able to just reach the ball carrier to tentacle him. Bayley now began a series of fouls on the floored blitzer that would some to nothing despite three assists each time.

Waste Try To Wriggle Clear
Orblio was shepherding Bactillia and Cheg and Malekor were amongst those players in desperate pursuit. The ball carrier broke away from Bactillia and again with a supreme effort Cheg and the beast caught the attacker blocking his path to score. We were pushing our luck especially given Bactillia’s bouts of stupidity. We were a hairs breadth from a crucial fail.

Time A Wasting
Extra time and sadly three of four KO players returned for the Waste that but still only left nine players to face our full squad. Hastican won the toss and we received of course. The Humans blitzed, knocking out Qualacob. Meanwhile whilst all three lineman on the scrimmage line were downed as usual Vhan failed to collect the ball.

Extreme Fail To Press Advantage
Malekor went down, but then a swift failed dodge turnover for the Waste. But still Vhan could not gather the ball and the humans were pressing and Orblio left the field seriously injured. Now nine a side. Things were not looking good.

Stripped
At last Vhan held on to the ball, only to be stripped by the blitzer who recovered it at the second attempt as it bounced clear. The humans poured down our right to protect the ball carrier, Gotchamee left the field injured and now we were outnumbered. Vhan failed to get the ball back and as we closed in the blitzer broke away and scored rather than risk being caught.

Extreme Advance Too Late
Little time left and then a riot delayed the game still further. With KO recovery successful and Gotchamee regenerated we returned for the final drive. Gotchamee recovered the shortish kick and advanced on the left and we pushed forward two rotters and Shascue who then fell going for it.

Simple Plan
So all we needed to do to score was for Gotchamee to go for it to make a quick pass forward to Vhan who could blitz down the catcher and score with two go for its. We needed 2, 3, 3, star to avoid the need for at least one dodge of at least 3, then 2, 2. I don’t know why I’m wasting my time with this: What we got was 6, 1. Fumble! Game over.

How Did We Lose That?
So out of the cup with a performance that saw the two cheating agility four humans make the difference. Their remarkable fluky break away had not resulted in a score but had certainly denied us. A lot of double skulling by both sides in a game that we dominated for long periods but failed to convert. The brilliant exploding tooth ploy also failed to pay off.

Rotters Galore
A slightly unusual casualty result – 3-3 but all three of ours kills. Extreme are now our first team of any persuasion to have more than 8 linemen on the squad and our first chaos team to have more than 7 rotters. Needless to say, Hastican was apoplectic:

Last Words
‘Hanging droopily and nasty real Wednesday play off calamity. Instagram fortunate maximum diabolised missed Xeroxing, shameful battlecruiser flash over and recovered bell trouncing, what crapulence, what torpor and mountainous studios.’ You said it Hastican.

Anorak Corner

As the competitions of BBV hot up a review of our previous history including all franchise teams as a special treat for stats fans:*

*We know that you’re out there!

Dead Ringers:

BBIII
Played: 8 Won 5 Lost 2 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 4 Lost 3 Drew 1

BBIV
Played: 11 Won 9 Lost 1 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 7 Lost 2 Drew 2

Overall
Played 19 Won 14 Lost 3 Drew 2
Casualties: Won 11 Lost 5 Drew 3

Entropic Marauders

BBII
Played: 21 Won 6 Lost 11 Drew 4
Casualties: Won 13 Lost 5 Drew 3

BBIII
Played: 17 Won 8 Lost 6 Drew 3
Casualties: Won 12 Lost 2 Drew 3

BBIV
Played: 8 Won 5 Lost 3
Casualties: Won 4 Lost 4

Overall
Played 46 Won 19 Lost 20 Drew 7
Casualties Won 29 Lost 11 Drew 6

Eternal Champions

BBI
Played 34 Won 10 Lost 15 Drew 9
Casualties: Won 15 Lost 13 Drew 6

BBII
Played: 18 Won 5 Lost 10 Drew 3
Casualties Won 3 Lost 12 Drew 3

BBIII
Played 17 Won 5 Lost 10 Drew 2
Casualties Won 6 Lost 6 Drew 5

BBIV
Played 8 Won 3 Lost 4 Drew 1
Casualties Won 3 Lost 5

BBV
Played 7 Won 5 Lost 1 Drawn 1
Casualties Won 5 Lost 1 Drawn 1

Overall
Played 84 Won 28 Lost 40 Drew 16
Casualties Won 32 Lost 37 Drew 15

Extreme Prejudice

BBIII

Played: 14 Won 8 Lost 6
Casualties: Won 7 Lost 5 Drew 2

BBIV

Played: 10 Won 5 Lost 3 Drew 2
Casualties: Won 7 Lost 3

Between BBIV & V
Played: 8 Won 4 Lost 3 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 3 Lost 3 Drew 2

BBV to date (28.5.16)
Played: 9 Won 3 Lost 4 Drew 2
Casualties: Won 4 Lost 1 Drew 4

Overall
Played: 41 Won 20 Lost 16 Drew 5
Casualties: Won 21 Lost 12 Drew 8

The Foretold

BBIII
Played: 8 Won 4 Lost 4
Casualties: Won 5 Lost 2 Drew 1

BBIV
Played: 7 Won 6 Lost 1
Casualties: Won 3 Lost 2 Drew 2

Overall
Played: 15 Won 10 Lost 5
Casualties: Won 8 Lost 4 Drew 3

Talabac Tornados

BBIII
Played: 13 Won 10 Lost 2 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 5 Lost 5 Drew 3

BBIV
Played: 6 Won 2 Lost 3 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 3 Lost 2 Drew 1

Overall
Played: 19 Won 12 Lost 5 Drew 2
Casualties: Won 8 Lost 7 Drew 4

Tombspawn United

BBIV
Played 1 Won 1
Casualties Drew 1

Vernaculan Renegades

BBII
Played: 18 Won 8 Lost 9 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 12 Lost 5 Drew 1

BBIII
Played: 13 Won 7 Lost 5 Drew 1
Casualties: Won 8 Lost 4 Drew 1

BBIV
Played: 7 Won 5 Lost 2
Casualties: Won 2 Lost 5

Overall
Played: 38 Won 20 Lost 16 Drew 2
Casualties: Won 22 Lost 14 Drew 2

Results By Season

BBI 34 Games
Won: 29%
Casualty Wins: 44%

BBII 57 Games
Won: 33%
Casualty Wins: 49%

BBIII 90 Games
Won: 52%
Casualty Wins: 52%

BBIV 58 Games
Won: 68%
Casualty Wins: 50%

Interim Games 8 Games
Won: 50%
Casualty Wins: 37.5%

BBV to Date 16 Games
Won: 50%
Casualty Wins: 56%

Listed in order of Success using win percentage:

Tombspawn United 100%
Dead Ringers 73%
The Foretold 66%
Talabac Tornados 63%
Vernaculan Renegades 52%
Extreme Prejudice 48%
Entropic Marauders 41%
Eternal Champions 33%

In order of success by casualty wins:

Entropic Marauders 63%
Vernaculan Renegades 57%
Dead Ringers 57%
The Foretold 53%
Extreme Prejudice 51%
Talabac Tornados 42%
Eternal Champions 38%
Tombspawn United 0%

263 Games Played

Won 124 47%
Lost 105 40%
Drawn 34 13%

Casualty
Won 131 49%
Lost 90 34%
Drawn 42 16%

Honours

Dead Ringers
Runners up Bugmans League BBIII
Unfriendly league winners BBIV

Entropic Marauders
Champions AFC BBIII
Runners up Spike BBIII
Runners up MB Cup BBIV

Extreme Prejudice
Semi Finalists Chaos Cup BBIII
Semi Finalist Chaos Cup BBV

Eternal Champions
Champions BBI Open League
Runners up NFC BBIV
Semi Finalists MB Cup BBIV
Semi Finalists Dungeonbowl BBV

The Foretold
None

Talabac Tornados
Champions Bugmans League BBIII
Semi Finalists MB Cup BBIV

Tombspawn United
None

Vernaculan Renegades
Runners up AFC BBIII
Semi Finalists Dungeonbowl IV
Winners MB Cup BBIV

The ICF
Eternal support; for Eternal Champions

• The ICF is seeking more employees in the Marienburg area.
• If you are energetic, self motivated, enjoy working with people both alive and dead, we have the right career for you.
• We welcome applications from the live and dead communities, and offer competitive packages including full health and death coverage.

THE ICF:
IN LIFE: SERVICE;
IN DEATH: QUALITY.

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